We’re Ashley + Jenna, and we help women break free from the myth of perfection.
Have you ever met someone and instantly thought, “Wow, this person is awesome, and I need to be her friend!” Like you just knew they landed in your universe for a reason? Yep, that’s what it was like when we met. It wasn’t long before we were talking about how we could collaborate and create something amazing together. From a shared passion for supporting women in living their best lives free from perfectionism, Eff Perfect was born. Having both struggled with perfectionism in our own lives, we know firsthand how paralyzing it can be. Too many women (ourselves included!) let perfectionism run, and sometimes ruin, their lives. We’re here to say eff that.
Our Perfectionism Stories
At a very young age, I can remember perfectionism having a hold on me. I had an intense desire to not just succeed at whatever I did, but to be perfect at it. Whether it was basketball, building a fort, math, my body, or hanging Tupac pictures on my wall, everything needed to be perfect. Otherwise, a wave of shame and not-enoughness would wash over me, and I’d immediately start contemplating how I could prove I was perfect. This striving-to-be-perfect attitude became a vicious cycle well into my womanhood. For me, seeking perfectionism wasn’t about being perfect, it was about avoiding criticism and needing praise as a way to convince myself (and prove to others) I was worthy and enough. Unfortunately, my perfectionism led to years of procrastination, body image issues, fear of criticism, and ultimately wound up holding me back from living my best life. I would alter and navigate my world based on what others expected of me or what was “likeable.” For me, perfectionism was a defense mechanism, yet all it ever truly protected me from was being the authentic, real, badass, and imperfect Ashley that I am.
Perfectionism has been part of my journey for as long as I can remember. The striving started in my childhood with perfect homework, perfect grades, and a perfectly cleaned room and spiraled from there into all areas of my life. I weighed myself down with expectations to be the smartest, the funniest, the most talented and beat myself up every time fell short of my completely unrealistic standards. By the time I finished high school, I was totally burnt out on achievement. In college, I chose opt out of everything I had once chased - good grades, music, theater. The pressure had become too much. But perfectionism wouldn’t let me go. So, I contorted all of that goal-chasing into a new mission: to be nice. The nicest, sweetest, most giving, generous person I could ever hope to be. And instead of becoming my best self, I turned into the ultimate people-pleaser, strung out on others’ positive perceptions of me in order to feel good enough. When I was 21, the death of my dad snapped life into sharp focus and set me on a long, winding, not always forward-moving practice of reclaiming myself from the grips of people-pleasing and perfectionism. To this day, each of my relationships and experiences serves as a teacher and an opportunity to choose presence over perfection. Sometimes I fail, but I keep practicing. Who’s with me?
More about Ashley
Ashley is a Women’s Wellness + Empowerment Coach and Yoga Teacher who supports women in creating loving, positive relationships with food and body. Some of her favorite things: journaling, dancing, being bold, Oprah, music and concert-going, learning and leadership, anything that has to do with the ocean, drinking wine, and the occasional table dance.
More About Jenna
At her core, Jenna is a healer. From over a decade supporting clients’ healing in her psychotherapy practice to sparking business healing for coaches and entrepreneurs, Jenna co-creates with her clients game-changing shifts in their lives and businesses. She knows, deep down in her bones, that presence always trumps perfection, and building community is what lights her up most. If you want to see Jenna at her giddiest (and geekiest), invite her to your next creative brainstorming session. She lives for that. And if you want to see her in her happy place, you need only three things: the ocean, music, and the people she loves the most. Bonus points for bringing along Reilly and Raider, her beloved pups.
What we know is true...
The world needs your authenticity and your imperfections.
Being imperfect, taking risks, and messing up is how we grow and learn.
You are enough, just as you are.
You arrived on this earth worthy, and nothing you have, will, or could ever possibly do will change that.
Perfectionism is a drug that keeps us forever chasing the high of being better, more deserving, more worthy.
The only approval you need is your own.